The 3-Part Intentional Networking Framework
Turn conference handshakes into real relationships with location notes, a follow-up system, and personalized outreach
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~months to results
- Steps
- 8
- Confidence
- 88%
The framework converts scattered goodwill into a repeatable relationship engine with three moving parts. First, capture geography: whenever you meet someone worth knowing, note the city they live in, because location is what turns a vague intention into a concrete plan the next time you travel there. Second, build a follow-up system outside your memory — a shared database with a card per person and a city tag, so a trip to Denver or Austin instantly surfaces who to contact and why. Third, run personalized outreach that gives before it asks: feature their work in your newsletter, credit their framework in your own content, send a gift tied to something they specifically mentioned, or broker an introduction only you can make. The mechanism is asymmetric generosity plus patience — by the time you make the ask, you have already proven you were worth their time.
Origin
Jasmine Star built the framework after realising she had met remarkable people at events but never followed up in a way that lasted. She decided in 2025 to be deliberate about friendships and peer groups, and codified what she had been doing loosely into three repeatable moves.
Core principles
- 01Good begets good — give value with no expectation of return
- 02A relationship that starts transactional stays shallow
- 03Where someone lives is the most underrated piece of relationship data
- 04Memory is a system, not a talent — capture it outside your head
- 05Proximity plus patience beats a cold ask every time
- 06Personalize to the person, not to their job title
How to run it
- 1
Ask where they live
In the first real conversation, find out what city the person is based in and record it immediately. Location turns a nice conversation into a future plan.
Pro tip Listen for it passively too — people mention their city on stage or in passing, and that counts.
- 2
Log the person in a shared database with a city tag
Create a card for each person in a tool like Notion, including who they are, what you admire, and a tag for their city. The team can add cards too.
Pro tip Make the card creatable from your phone or Slack in the moment, before the detail fades.
Watch out A note buried in your head or a random notes app is not a system — it has to be searchable by city.
- 3
Filter by city before every trip
When a trip or event gets booked, search the database by that city and pull the list of people you already wanted to connect with.
Pro tip Book the trip first and let the list tell you who to invite, rather than waiting for perfect timing.
- 4
Warm the connection well before the ask
Weeks or months ahead, start engaging with them on social, in their newsletter, or in their podcast comments so the eventual invitation lands as familiar rather than cold.
Pro tip Subscribe to their newsletter and listen to their show so your outreach references something specific.
- 5
Send public signals that they matter
Feature what you learned from them in your newsletter, credit their framework in your own content, and link back to them so their audience grows because of you.
Pro tip Apply their idea in your own domain and show the result — that proves you actually studied them.
Watch out Do not do this as a hidden bribe; it only works if you would have done it anyway.
- 6
Personalize the gesture to the person, not the role
Send something small and specific tied to something they said or someone they love, rather than a generic card or gift card.
Pro tip Cheap and specific beats expensive and generic — a $15 pair of the socks they complimented lands harder.
- 7
Broker introductions only you can make
Connect two people you know deeply on both sides, explaining the synergy explicitly. Do it without expecting anything back.
Pro tip Only introduce people who both know you well — otherwise the introduction has no weight.
Watch out A cold 'you two should meet' DM between people who barely know you devalues your name.
- 8
Detach from the outcome and keep going
Accept that the podcast invite, the meeting, or the friendship may not land on your timeline. Keep giving and keep the card in the system.
Pro tip Track how long it takes — a year between meeting and recording is normal, not a failure.
In the wild
Jasmine met entrepreneur Cassey Ho at a business event and wanted her on the podcast, but Cassey was extremely busy. Rather than pitching repeatedly, Jasmine logged that Cassey lived in Austin as a card in Notion with a city tag. Roughly seven months after the event, and about a year after first wanting the interview, Jasmine finally got to Austin and recorded the episode in Cassey's city rather than asking her to travel to Newport.
→ The interview happened on Cassey's terms, in her city, about a year after the initial intention.
After seeing former Navy SEAL and author Rich Diviney speak at an event in Houston, Jasmine assumed he was out of her podcast's league. Instead of a cold pitch, she had the team create a card noting he lived near Virginia Beach, wrote a newsletter featuring what she learned from him and linking to him, recorded a podcast episode applying his framework on uncertainty to entrepreneurship, and only then sent a DM inviting him on the show.
→ The dates did not work, but the public signals stayed live as proof she was worth his time.
Jasmine met Bonnie Christine at a one-day mastermind in Nashville and wanted a genuine friendship, not a loose social follow. While working out and hanging out, Bonnie twice complimented Jasmine's socks and asked where she got them. Jasmine ordered the same ribbed Stance socks — about fifteen dollars — and sent them to her as a small, specific thank-you.
→ A cheap, hyper-personal gift that signalled 'I see you, I know you' and deepened a new friendship.
Common mistakes
Treating follow-up as a memory problem
Relying on recall means the connection decays into an occasional social-media like. Without a searchable card and a city tag, the intention never converts into a trip, a meal, or an invitation.
Leading with the ask
Opening with what you want makes the relationship transactional, and people can feel it. The give has to come first and has to be real enough that you would have done it regardless.
Sending generic gifts
A thank-you card or an Amazon gift card signals effort without attention. The gesture only lands when it references something the person specifically said or someone they love.
Is it for you?
Best for
Creators, founders, and podcast hosts who want access to higher-calibre rooms and guests without cold-pitching strangers.
Not ideal for
Anyone chasing a fast transactional win, or who cannot sustain months of no-return giving before a relationship pays off.
From the transcript
“Three ways to build authentic and intentional relationships. Number one, ask where people live. Number two, a system to follow up. And number three would…”
“I like to make a personal note of where they live because I want to draw up personal connections.”
“The best networking is asking yourself, what could I do for others without any expectation in return?”
From the episode
The Art of Intentional Networking: My 3-Part Framework